Our wee man at 25 weeks gestation (over 6 weeks ago)
It’s Christmas Eve today. Our Christmas wish this year is not to get to meet our baby for Christmas – we’re hoping he will stay in and have Christmas inside my tummy… it’s looking more and more likely we’ll get our wish and that’s all we can ask for.
My hospital appointment went well on Tuesday. I must say though – what a wait! It still managed to take about 2 hours for the appointment even though we only saw one Dr. We wait in the atrium rather than the normal waiting area so I get to lie down on a couch and read while we wait. Must say though, because of all the hot weather, the atrium can be a bit stifling hot… but have found a well placed sofa that gets a little breeze from the air conditioning vent. I did get the evil eye from a staff member as I have seen her that couch many times, and now I know why… it’s the coolest place in the atrium. Anyway…
The Dr’s are just so happy that I have made it this far I think. I talked to the Dr about all my symptoms I’ve been having but they are all very general normal pregnancy symptoms so nothing to be concerned about. I’ve just never been this far along (31 weeks, 3 days now) so I guess I am to expect to experience all these weird and wonderful new things. The sore tummy button, sore tummy and more intense, gripping braxton hicks. No scan though this week – just measured my tummy which was bang on normal, and listened to our little mans heart beat which still sounded like a horse trotting along. Because of the holidays our next appointment will be in 3 1/2 weeks time, for a growth scan to see how bubs is doing, and a check for me. That will be 34 1/2 weeks gestation… our target is 34. Would be great to make it to that appointment.
On Wednesday night I woke at 2.30 in the morning and went for just one of the usual loo stop during the night. When I got back to bed I felt quite a bit of pressure bearing down, had a sore achy lower back and lower abdomen, a slightly sore groin area and I felt nauseous. I must say I was thinking to myself I have been just too complacent that I will make it further just because I am 31 weeks, and now I am going to be taught a lesson to never make assumptions… It seemed a little similar to the beginning stages of when I went into early labour with our wee girl last year. I had some water and reflux medicine and Roger stayed awake with me until the symptoms eased up and I dropped to sleep again. If the pain had intensified or it had gone on for too long I would have gone to the hospital, but thankfully it was only 1 hour of discomfort and then all was fine again.
The next night (once again while trying to sleep) I felt a pulling sensation really low down inside, and I guess I can’t help but wonder if perhaps my cervix is trying to open and there is some resistance because of my cerclage. Who knows… might just be random and not related, but each time I turned over I would feel this sensation that just seems so in line with my cervical stitch being pulled. Once again, by the morning everything seems fine again so perhaps it is just coincidental.
Apart from that though, I’ve been feeling fine. A bit tired, but who isn’t during pregnancy. Still am being so well looked after by Roger who continues to be amazing, and my Mum who is up here from Tuesdays – Fridays each week, and Rogers Mum who is normally here on Mondays. Everyone is doing their best to give this precious little boy a great start in life and the chance to stay inside me as long as possible. And of course other friends, family and neighbours who are always offering to help out in any way they can. Not that we take them up on the offers, but still it’s just nice to know we have good support if we need it.
I have been having crazy dreams. Had repetitive ones that used to be about me being in the middle of the Coromandel on holiday and then realising I was on bed rest and the only way to get back to the bach was to ride a bike and freaking out whether that would bring on labour. I’ve progressed to dreams about having a baby and completely forgetting to feed him or her (sometimes I have a girl). It’s pretty stressful in my dream realising the baby has been born a day or two ago and I still haven’t fed him or her once, and I go into panic mode, trying to find my baby and feed it. The last baby dream was I’d just had our baby, and he was pretty big. The first time I saw him he was in a high chair fully dressed and about a year old (even though in my dream he was just born) and smiling at me with his big blue eyes. I must say he looked like he was my cousin’s 1 year old boy, but with blue eyes… couldn’t help thinking he looked heaps like her husband… ha! (the ivf clinic would have a thing or two to answer if that was the case). But now my latest dream is about me being really fat. (this one might be closer to the truth than the other dreams). It’s pretty concerning and I am regretting eating all those ice creams and chips and chocolate bars. I guess it is reflecting what’s going through my mind right now. I have had a few things that I put on to wear (skirts, dresses and underwear) and they don’t fit anymore. I am really a bit shocked that they seemed so large and I never though I would ever outgrow them and now I have… what the? I’ve now put on about 8kg and it is just fat depositing everywhere now, not just my stomach!! Waddle waddle…
I am starting to worry a little that we haven’t got ANYTHING ready for the arrival of a baby. We always said we’d wait until after Christmas, but now I am starting to freak out that if a baby did come along we wouldn’t be prepared for him – we wouldn’t know what we are doing with him, and we have nothing ready – no clothes, nappies, equipment at all. I guess we know he would be in NICU for a bit so that would give us time to get things sorted, but still. And at the same time my Mum told me she had bought something for the baby to come home in the other day and I just freaked out, not wanting anything bought for him right now just incase. And my niece offered to drop her baby’s pram off here so we could see it and check whether we were interested in buying it from her, but I just couldn’t do it. I told her I knew it completely made sense and was logical, but I simply couldn’t face it. I couldn’t handle the thought of a pram sitting downstairs right now, just incase once again we are caught out with making assumptions we are going to have a live baby again. So I have a few conflicting thoughts at the moment. I am trying to read books about what to expect once the baby is born but I am feeling pretty overwhelmed by it all and just don’t have a very good attention span for taking much in at a time. Hopefully I will manage to get into it a bit more as time goes on.
Oh, and we might have a new contender for a name… that will be exciting if we both continue to like it!!
Well, better go – Christmas day tomorrow. Will be like none other we have ever had. Our lovely neighbour is going to deliver us Christmas brunch so we are lucky to have such a thoughtful person next door. It will give Roger a break too, since he hasn’t allowed me to get up to prepare any food at all ever since I’ve been on bed rest.
Have a fantastic Christmas day to whoever is reading this!! May the bubbas in our tummy enjoy their first Christmases in utero!
2ndgo's Blog 