34 weeks despite high risk of pre-term labour!

34 weeks tomorrow!?! This was always my target from way back at 19 weeks when I started bed rest… make it to 34 weeks I thought and there is a good chance bubs will be OK. I’m practically there! The Dr’s didn’t give us much hope early on about getting this far, but I told them we were ambitious with our target which they agreed with. 34 weeks seemed like a good gestation (if we were going to have a premmie) as at around 34 weeks the sucking reflex is normally developed which means hopefully if bubs was born around nowish he would be able to be fed by me without relying on a tube to be fed through.

So it will also be 15 weeks, or 105 days of bed rest tomorrow. Crazy! It becomes so much easier to be on bed rest now there is an end in sight. Those 19-24 weeks were just awful in comparison!!

I’ve been really tired lately. I guess anyone at 34 weeks is feeling like this too. You would think since I am resting all day I would be conserving my energy and therefore not feel quite so exhausted, but obviously it doesn’t work like that. Baking this little guy inside takes its toll on my body no matter what…

Sleeping at night is bizarre now. I don’t have a problem sleeping at all, but I wake about every 1-3 hours and have to get up to pee. (I am drinking alot of water, since this helps reduce the chance of pre-term birth but normally taper off the amount I’m drinking by early evening, oh and holding it in isn’t recommended as it can cause irritation to my uterus causing contractions). It just amazes me how often I need to pee at nights and that I also always seem to have something there, not just the urge… Last night for example I went to bed at 10.15ish, slept – woke at 11.15, slept – woke up at 12.45, slept – woke up at 1.45, slept – woke up at 4.00, slept – woke up at 6.15. It amazes me how many times I have to get up. I wonder if it is my body starting to get ready for having a wee baby to look after – all those sleepless nights coming up?

So I’m sure I can blame some of my tiredness on my odd sleeping patterns at night. At least I AM sleeping – I am thankful for that. I know it is common to have a problem sleeping this far through the pregnancy, but despite all the wake up times at least I go to sleep fairly quickly and easily afterwards. I struggle sleeping during the day sometimes… it’s like I am almost over tired and I just can’t seem to rest my mind enough to fall asleep despite being nacked.

I had a VERY exciting day yesterday, and I mean that sincerely too 🙂 I got to break my bed rest for 1-2 hours!

I had to go get a blood test to check my full blood count / ferritin prior to my appointment on Thursday, so Sunday suited Roger better to take me. So I got to step outside into the sunshine and appreciate the glorious day,  go for a car ride, interact with someone outside the house (even if she was jabbing a needle into me – I so enjoyed it). Then since we were literally driving past a shopping mall Roger went into the shop to get a video case while I waited in the car (oh, we bought a new video camera to be able to record our wee man when he comes along). Anyway, we also went to a furniture shop to look at some recliners Roger has his eye on… once again very exciting to get to walk around a furniture store, but Roger put the brakes on a bit concerned that I’d been doing too much. Before going home we also called into a cafe incase there was anything pregnancy suitable in their cabinet for me for lunch, (but of course there wasn’t), and then I waited in the car while Roger went into our organic supermarket just down the road. While I was waiting for him I got a phone call from my sister wondering what was going on with me… she was worried as she and my other sister and my mum had all tried calling our house a few times with no reply. Quite funny how they freak out a bit if they can’t get hold of me. In future I must remember to phone and let them know I am going to be getting out of the house. It so rarely happens, unless I am off to the hospital I guess. Nice to know they care 🙂

The day I had my Cervical Suture

It was a long and tiring day. We were at the hospital from 9am in the morning, went through the pre-op checks and then just had to sit about and wait. I was booked for surgery as an acute patient, so they just slotted me in during the afternoon. There were lots of emergencies that morning so it wasn’t until about 3.30 they were ready for me. Lucky Roger and I had our books to read while waiting.

We spoke to the obstetrician who would do the surgery and the anaestheticst before the surgery. I asked if I could have a scan or listen to my baby’s heartbeat prior to the procedure, and the Dr agreed to if I really wanted to. I got the impression he didn’t see the point, but I thought why not if I feel like it. I must say the obstetrician who was just about to do the surgery used the doppler to find the heartbeat, and didn’t give us very much confidence he knew what he was doing. He was holding the doppler far to far down, over my pubic bone… he kept saying I should get it if I hold it just above your pubic bone… even I knew he needed to move it up over my lower abdomen, not the pubic bone. Bizarre that he didn’t know how to do this especially since he is an obstetrician and then off to theatre I went with him.

The procedure itself normally only takes 5-10 minutes but I was a bit unlucky with much of what went on. First, the anesthetist recommended a spinal block if I wanted to reduce the effects on the baby (which I was concerned about). So up on the bed I hopped and assumed the position sitting up with my lower back curved so he could spike the needle in. He must have had about 3 goes before it was in right. At one point he must have hit a nerve as I felt as though a shock went don’t my entire left leg and into my foot.

It wasn’t until I was lying down on the table that we realised the spinal block wasn’t working as it should. I had tingling all the way down my legs and couldn’t feel my butt, but could feel from my pubic bone area up. It was my choice what to do… they could give me sedative or painkiller, but then the baby would feel the effects, so I decided to just see how I go. It was certainly not that pleasant – I probably wasn’t feeling everything but it wasn’t effectively blocking my pain and at times I was almost in tears, but just tried to breathe through it. The anaesthetist was beside me the whole time and had some concerns that my heartbeat was about 150… probably due to the pain. I looked at the clock and when they started it was almost 3:50 so I figured if it was over by 4pm I could try to handle it. . But it went overtime and then when I was finally sighing relief when they said it was almost over and finished I got more bad news.

The obstetrician told me it was not successful, so they would have to start again, from scratch. They weren’t happy with the tightness of the suture or stitch. There was just no way I could go through it all again without any painkillers. So I had to relent and accept some painkillers to ease the pain. It really was a piece of cake when I couldn’t feel what they were doing. The anesthetist tried to ease my mind telling me the baby would only feel a bit sleepy for 10 minutes or so and also said  ‘when you had your c-section last year your baby would have also had the same drug, so hopefully that’s reassuring for you’. I responded immediately ‘no, it doesn’t reassure me actually since she died’ . He just laughed. That was a bizarre response I thought. I closed my eyes and started to cry.

So not the most pleasant of experiences!! Also, I had met all the operating theatre team prior to them starting, but then just as the procedure started another Dr entered the room and was working on me to. I have no idea if he was a trainee or senior, but no one introduced him to me and it did feel rather wrong to have him walk in at the final hour and be involved. Talk about feeling like a piece of meat on the table!! He also kept bumping my legs and leaning on them at times… very off-putting!!

Recovery was OK, but I stayed in hospital overnight. It took about 5 hours for me to completely regain the feeling in my legs and butt and I was sore from the op and feel a bit woosey. Anyway it’s over now!!

Off to hospital tomorrow

They have booked me in to get a cervical suture at the hospital tomorrow. Can’t say I’m looking forward to it, but I guess it sounds like this might be the best thing going forward to minimise the risk of going into premature labour again. The chances are 50:50 of me going into premature labour this time round so I guess anything that can be done to prevent it are worth giving a go.

The obstetrician looked up the notes from my laser cone biopsy I’d had 11 years ago and said she considered the amount of cervix I had removed to be significant. I had a bad smear which indicated there were pre-cancerous cells (Cin II) way back then, so required the laser cone biopsy to treat and remove the area of cells that weren’t looking good. I remember at the time being just given a local for the procedure (not pleasant) so was quite aware of what was happening, and remember them removing quite a cone-shaped piece. Turns out it was approx 25mm x 25mm x 25mm – a considerable amount removed according to our obstetrician.

So with the fact that I previously went into premature labour, combined with the amount of cervix I have already had removed they advised us to get a cervical suture which will aid in keeping my cervix closed should I start to go into early labour again. I am looking it as a thing that needs to be done for the greater good I guess… The alternative was just to have weekly ultrasounds to check the size of the cervix, but apparently once the cervix starts to dilate it is too late to do anything to stop it.

So I’ll be having a very early breakfast tomorrow morning (nothing allowed after 7am), then off to hospital I’ll go. I need to be there by 9am, and the procedure will be performed that afternoon. I’m a bit of a problem child when it comes to anaesthetic as I am difficult to intubate, but I’m told instead of a general anaesthetic or a spinal / epidural they will give me a sedative instead. I was initially quite surprised a cervical stitch would require such hard-core pain relief… I don’t expect it to be pleasant, but I am sure I have been through worse 🙂

I was initially quite worried about the effects the sedative will have on the baby and really don’t like the thought of it, but there is no real alternative. So I am just going with the flow. They have reassured me that they use sedatives that are the safest possible for pregnancy, so I guess I just have to trust I am in safe hands.

Depending on how things go I’ll either be let to go home later on that evening, or may be required to stay overnight. So that’s my latest. Oh, and I am 13 weeks pregnant today.

12 Week Nuchal Fold Scan

What a day it’s been! Today was our 12 week nuchal scan, and also our first appointment with the high risk clinic. We needed to go to the same hospital where 1 year earlier, almost to the day I gave birth to our little girl, and then less than 48 hours later, she died in that hospital. I had to spend a week in there, recovering from my rather complex c-section. It wasn’t until I walked into the doors that it all came crashing down on me… I walked into the clinic doors, took one look and turned around and walked straight out again, overwhelmed by tears. It was such an unexpected reaction. I had no idea I would feel so emotional. I wasn’t dreading going to the hospital. The meltdown was not something I saw coming at all. The staff was all so lovely and allowed us to wait outside the clinic until it was our time to get the ultrasound.

The ultrasound was quite upsetting too. I remembered about a year beforehand being in one of the ultrasound rooms, seeing my uterus for the first time, without a baby. I know this ultrasound was about the baby I have growing inside me now, but I just couldn’t stop thinking about our little girl we lost. And the sadness about why she couldn’t have lived. She would have been fine probably had I not gone into labour prematurely. I felt bad that for at least the first 1/3 – 1/2 of the ultrasound I was thinking about her, and not this baby. I still felt a little bit detached though.

Anyway, as the ultrasound progressed I started to think more about this baby. The scan went well, and from what they could see things are looking good. The nuchal translucency / nuchal fold measurement was 1.4mm so in a normal range. We still have to wait for the results of blood tests, urine tests, swabs etc. so we will have a better idea of what the results are in a couple of days.

The clinic was very thorough and we are feeling very well looked after already. Our appointments with the range of health care professions – the midwife, obstetrician and physician all went well, and they have taken the time to go over my medical history and risks in detail. It’s nice to feel as though we are in good hands, and they are very reassuring! It did mean we needed to spend about 4 1/2 hours there though… so it was certainly a large chunk of the day.

Anyway, so the news is good so far. I guess my emotions are a little all over the place and had it not almost exactly coincide with the birth / death of our first child we might be feeling a bit more excited that things are looking good.

11 Weeks Pregnant

Well, today I am 11 weeks pregnant. I am off for a scan tomorrow at the hospital to see if everything is OK or not. I am still having spotting, but haven’t had anymore of those frightening cramps since Sat so have pretty much been on bed rest / couch potato duty to try to minimise the risk of something happening. I’ve had a bit of lower back pain too, but who knows if this is related to the other symptoms or not.

My Mum has been staying up here which has been great!! It’s at times like this there is no-one like Mum 🙂 Roger has been so fantastic too, but it is so good for him to have a bit of a break from being slave boy to me.

Will update again once I’ve been to the scan.

Scary symptoms

Well things still not so great. I have spent most of the day in bed, with little spells of lazing on the couch.  Still feeling really exhausted, and getting brown bleeding… turning darker. I got a bit worried tonight as I had some quite bad pain / cramping in my lower abdomen too, but it eased off after I’d been to the loo. I am not moving about much at all, and as usual feeling like I am on home detention. As usual Roger has been fantastic and catering to my every need. Poor guy is going to need a break from all this running around after me soon! My Mum is coming up tomorrow so will be nice to have her around.

I did speak to the woman’s assessment unit today and they said some women do get brown spotting during pregnancy but if it gets worse, turns into bright red or gets heavy and I get cramping with it I need to go to the hospital. I don’t think the cramping I had tonight counts since it eased off… fingers crossed anyway.

Plan to just stay in bed for most of tomorrow too…

High Risk Maternity Clinic

I made the phone call today to the high risk clinic to let them know they should receive a referral for me from my current obstetrician in the next day or two. I felt I needed to pre-warn them I am already 10 weeks pregnant and will be needing to have our nuchal fold scan in two weeks time. Perhaps seems a bit pushy not waiting for them to contact me, but I had a friend who was referred to the high risk clinic at 10 weeks and by the time they processed her referral they had her scheduled for her nuchal fold scan at 14-15 weeks (which might be bordering on too late).

I was so impressed with the response from the team. I had three follow-up phone calls from them today. They hadn’t even received my referral yet, but looked up my hospital notes and read through them. It would have been mainly about my pre-term labour last year with our daughter. She lived for 35 hours. They had obviously read the notes in detail as mentioned the fact that I had no warning when I went into labour which is right. I’m told they showed my notes to a specialist in stillborn and neo-natal deaths, and came back to me with recommendations on switching to a multi-vitamin rather than high dose folic acid tablets I was currently taking and told me I needed to start taking baby aspirin immediately. They also suggested I could take an anti-nausea drug to help ease my morning sickness, but since I am pretty sensitive to even the slightest drugs at times I prefer to play it safe and just ride through it without risking any drugs. I already feel as though I am being well looked after… it’s so nice!!

Apparently I can expect to have an appointment sent to me in the next couple of days as they have already booked me in for a 12 week scan and with one of the obstetricians there. I was just so impressed with the swift response and how quickly everything has been sorted after just a short phone call this morning.

They have also advised me I will need to have an ‘internal’ examination on the same day of the 12 week scan to check the state of my cervix. In the past I have had a laser cone biopsy for treatment for pre-cancerous cells CIN II (a bad smear) so I guess I might have a slightly higher risk of this being a problem, since I have had part of my cervix removed. Apparently they will measure my cervix (oh joy, where do they keep the measuring tape), and if there is any hint of incompetence they will probably put in a surgical suture / stitch. I haven’t researched the risks involved in this procedure, but of course there are some. My obstetrician seemed to think it would be a good idea regardless if it could possibly reduce the chance of a premature birth again, so I guess I will just roll with what the experts think.

Anyway, apart from feeling sick still, I am feeling quite comforted with all the attention from the high risk clinic!

Still not out of the real danger zone yet, but certainly getting closer to it…